the other day, my eighty-five year old in-laws are getting ready to make the hundredt-plus mile two-hour drive, up to see the new great-grandson and family.

in San Mateo, my mother-in-law [mom from here on] stepping into the car from the sidewalk, falls. twists her ankle bad enough to break bones. neighbors help her into the car. Father-inlaw proceedes to drive her the two-plus hour drive to our house. they pull up, mom can't walk or even be helped out of the car. they drive her to the emergency [kaiser, just a mile or two away, fortunately]... this was thursday, all afternoon in the ER, broken bones, no surgery needed at this time, therefore no hospitalization—but she is on a catheter and cannot put any weight on this leg for an indefinate length of time.

long story short. she's now in a care facillity twenty minutes away for an unkown period of time.

I'm afraid that's just the very beginning of the story. Families!

Old age and old bones suck.

at this point I am once again an advocate of reverse life insurance policies

I will never let myself get like that. never.

:(

wow. that's scary...why did the father in law not drive her to the hospital?!?

well wishes are on their way.

Originally posted by Tha.Riddla

wow. that's scary...why did the father in law not drive her to the hospital?!?

well wishes are on their way.

thanks to everyone for the well-wishes

as for why he drove all the way to our house? one of the mysteries of the situation. for now, he's driven home again and we've got mom in the care facility untill she caan get herself in and out of bed and into a whellchair. after that? who knows, neither home she would come home to, ours or theirs, isn't wheelchair accessable and once you've accessed with the wheelchair, there's nowhere to go in either house.

Originally posted by FlamingoJeff

Old age and old bones suck.

you are correct for the most-part, yet in this case, its more the old age than the bones. in the case of my mothr-in-law, she is like an over-sized toddler to watch her walk and maneuver.

:( Sorry to hear that Walt -- vibes heading her way from over here.

thanks

its very difficult for Sandra dealing with her dad and brothers and the liflelong issues they have—that's just one part... but then her inability to deal with that stuff ends up with her almost in a rage— against men in particular. guess where that leaves me?

eaxmple: guys that dropped off the wheelchair saturday night, said to her "it'll slide right in the back seat" ... next day, she's not having any help when I'm telling her it will not fit that way. she couldn't lift the goddamn thing to get it into the back seat... but she summoned up the strength to throw the motherfucker into the street. Finally, after her dad drove off for his two-hour trip home without goodbyes... finally I am able to convince her the hatchback would be much easier. that's why we have an SUV... mothefuckers. you think they would've considered to ask what kinda car?

I'ma just going to sleep early. glad to have work to go to, also early..

what is it they say? when one door closes, another opens? something like that.

My mother-in-law has been in full-time care facillities since she broke her ankle in January. The last facility has been down in the bay area... today, Sandra is bringing her mom home to live in our spare room for an indefinite period of time, as her dad's not doing well enough to take care of himself, let-alone her mom too.

My Dad hasn't been doing well. untill now its been his eyes and dimentia/alzheimers getting bad... they took him by ambulance to the hospital a couple of hours ago. It has taken me this long to fiind which hospital. I'm waiting for an initial report from the emergency room... it'll be another hour or two.

Hang in there, Walt.

thanks Jeff

finally spoke with my Mom, Pops is in the ICU but she still had no report from the doctors when we spoke,

When it rains, it pours. Hang tough, Sir.

Aw Jeez. :manhugs:

I hope everything works out for you and your folks Walt

Hope it's all ok - big hugs Walt.

Sending you hugs Walt. Hope everything works out x

thanks, my friends. last word I heard was from my younger brother last night. looks like they found evidence in scans that it was a stroke which has caused the change & the headaches. more tests today. I'll make the two hour drive later this morning.

thanks for all your thoughts, and hugs. certainly helps to share.

((<< vibes >>))

thanQ

I'll check in when I can, came into the office for a few hours to cover any loose ends, getting ready to hit the road in just a few minutes.

:vibes:

well, friends, I guess it's about time I check in...

long story, short... Dad did have a stroke. As far as strokes go, we were fortunate. He's back home, a little worse for the wear as they say, and a bit more of a burden on my mom... still has headaches and his vision on the right & depth perception seems to have gone.

that's the short version. I've still been trying to come to grips with the actual nightmare that the hospital stay turned out to be. my younger brother spent the first night in the hospital with dad, I spent the second night with him. one of the absolute worst nights of my life.

thanks for all your thoughts

Yeesh, terrible news though I'm glad to hear he more-or-less pulled through - it's no fun seeing your loved ones falling apart.

Originally posted by arigato

Yeesh, terrible news though I'm glad to hear he more-or-less pulled through - it's no fun seeing your loved ones falling apart.

that's the the crux of the biscuit right there

it was bad enough—something no son should have to experience—seeing dad cry himself to sleep imagining regrets he never had in life, much too late for changing anything, hoping everyone in his life doesn't hate him.

then two hours later, the nurses changed shifts. nurse walks in on his newly blind side, wakes him from a sound sleep [nightmare] to check his vitals and take blood. for all sense and purposes, he is twenty years old in the prison camp, and they have just singled him out for testing. when the nurse refuses to taky my blood, dad freaks out. he won't calm down for hours. each time the nurse leaves the room, he is pulling out the IV needle and all the heart monnitor connections. at around three thirty in the morning he is standing over me and the nurse holding the heart monitor in the air above his head daring anyone to take it from him, he's now determined to get it home to tear it appart and figure out what it is really supposed to do. the final straw in my own brain was holding him down restraining him as he is making me promise they won't give him "a shot" .. I'm back at sixteen years old staring him straight in the face, "go ahead. hit me if it will make you feel better" "we are just here to help, dad" just trying to help.

and I'm afraid that's just the first of my alzheimers nightmares.

I can't but begin to imagine what my poor mom is going through

Jesus Christ, Walt. What a fucking nightmare for everyone.

:manhugs:

wow Walt, what can you say? Hang in there.