A buddy and I are entering a poster design competition. You're allowed to submit multiple entrees - so far I came up with two. Today we got together and did the first concept. This is how it turned out, we're pretty happy with it. May do some editing tomorrow. Would love to hear some criticism.
We had experimented with some type and it didn't go well. Right before posting this I came up with a new phrase and played with a few different ways of displaying it.
The typefaces, and the solidness of the grey box into which you are placing it - are both very mismatched to the style of the illustration.
I would look for something that appears more textured, or handmade.
Also - it's hard to offer a truly effective critique about a poster without knowing the audience, and intent/subject of the poster. Since a poster is, by it's nature, a communication - it is not clear to me from your art (which I like) - what the message is, or to whom it is directed.
Its for a poster design competition against the death penalty.
The original phrase I came up with is not what was included, maybe that is the real problem. The phrase I came up with which led to all the design was: "Justice may be blind but society isn't."
Visually it's jumbled and compositionally weak.
My suggestions: 1. Needs more contrast. 2. And a more dynamic composition. 3. And better typography.
The grey and brown are too close tonally to the black. Punch that shit up some. Lighter (not brighter) browns. Maybe use white text. Don't pussyfoot around, a poster should be attention grabbing. You want subtlety, take up painting landscapes.
The eye reads left to right, top to bottom. Putting your text in a bar like that completely blocks visual flow, and the shooters are just lost in space. Think of the rule of thirds. Think of layout grids. Remember that because of the motion of the eye, you want to lead your viewer from one element to the next. Having your diagonal leading to the upper right is fine but you need more action in the left, too, that's where the viewer starts and you have to lead their eye from there. Think of text placement for that, maybe a block of text instead of a stripe. Think about type layout and don't forget type isn't just text; type is an important element of design. Maybe make the shooters larger.
Having the shooters in a different graphic style than the bags on their heads or their targets also confuses things. Either carry more of the shooter style into the rest of the composition (maybe the grey targets can be crisp?) or make the whole drawing the same style.I'd go for a slab (but not courier) or a sans (but not a system font), myself, but try this handy infographic to pick something more visually compelling. Avoid decorative fonts for this kind of message-based poster. Unless handled masterfully, decorative fonts are harder to read & you lose the impact of your message. As a beginner you're better off relying on strong layout.
One last thing... Conceptually, it's not clear. It could be taken to mean that they should be trying to hit the "brown target". Not to be a total bummer, but I think you need to come up with a stronger & clearer visual metaphor.
hmm thanks, only have a few days left so see what myself and hopefully my friend can do. At this point its the only one we've made because we found the competition pretty close to deadline.
Really good critique though thanks Arigato, I think I got some ideas to fix it up a bit both conceptually and visually. I didn't really take into acct the "try to hit the brown target" but you're right it could be taken that way.
Either way post the final. Glad you took the critique in the spirit it was meant - not trying to be harsh, just trying to help you get your chops.
psh I went through architecture school, I've been chewed up and spit out way worse than that! 
Nah a critique is just that though, if you can't handle the honest criticism you're in the wrong profession. My friend and I are getting together to finalize it as best we can before the deadline, I'll be sure to post what we settle on.